The Mocktopus
                           by Vikram Madan

                 Once I swam within the ocean,
                  Lulled by gentle lapping motion,
                   When I suddenly saw something –
                       Something strange as strange can be!
                 I felt a chill within my liver;
                  Goosebumps set me all aquiver;
                   Could not help but shiver, shiver –
                       Shiver in the cold, cold sea!
                 The sense of dread
                     Within my head
                         Emblazoned in my memory
                 The Mocktopus was mocking me!

                 Tentacles in Technicolor!
                  Puckered suckers nowhere duller!
                   It was sparing no expense in
                       Miming out a parody
                 With each synchronized contraction,
                  How it skewered my each action
                   A bizarre sideshow attraction
                       For the creatures of the sea!
                 And with no shame
                     These creatures came
                         To add to all my misery
                 The Mocktopus was mocking me!

                 Grudgingly now I must tell you
                  Just how well it did excel too
                   Had I but not my perspective,
                       I too might have shared the glee
                 But I had to keep my focus
                  Focused on not being the locus
                   Of this mocking hocus pocus
                       In the middle of the sea
                 So I hurried –
                     hurried, scurried –
                         from that scene of mockery
                 The Mocktopus was mocking me!

                 If only that very morning,
                  I had not ignored the warning,
                   Perhaps I might not have had to
                       Suffer the ignominy
                 But now from krill to fish to whale,
                  There’s none who hasn’t heard the tale
                   Of how the Mocktopus prevailed,
                       In shaming me that day at sea
                 In shaming me –
                     Ill-faming me! –
                         Using its mocking mastery
                 The Mocktopus was mocking me!

                ***

              The Scarmadillo
              by Vikram Madan

They warned me once, they warned me twice
They said “Don’t Stare! It won’t be nice!”
        But looking back in retrospect
They should have warned me at least thrice!

I could not help fidget and fret
I tried to pay attention, yet
        When I saw it coming from far
All that they said, I did forget!

The Scarmadillo had a scar!
That scar pulsed brightly like a star!
        Could I pretend it wasn’t there?
(That scar was bigger than a car!)

Fueled by my gawking blatant stare,
The tension mounted in the air
        An awkward silence, thick and bland
While sweat dripped off our eyebrow hair!

At long, at last, he grinned “It’s grand!
“The things they’ll sell you in this land!”
        And then he burrowed in the sand
Leaving his fake scar in my hand...

    *** 

            BABLOON
        by Vikram Madan

I caught a Babloon by the tail
    But wasn’t holding tight
He puffed up like a puffer fish
    And gave me quite a fright
And slipped out of my sweaty hands
    And vanished in the night

The next day I put on thick gloves
    And vowed to hold on firm
But I did not anticipate
    How well Babloons can squirm
Once more he left me standing there
    (Just me and all my germs)

And that’s why I used Super Glue
    (The strongest I could find)
And six weeks later I can vouch,
    How well that glue did bind!
Wherever now the Babloon floats,
    I follow close behind…

***